


Dozing Green

by cadkitten



Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Blood, Death, Explicit Language, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-05-27
Updated: 2008-05-27
Packaged: 2017-11-14 00:48:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/509549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cadkitten/pseuds/cadkitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Die is a paid killer. Kyo is his cover-up guy. But Kyo has always longed to be in Die's place, rather than lurking in the shadows to clean it all up. One night something goes wrong and Kyo's left with the implement of destruction in his hands and his heart on the ground.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dozing Green

**Author's Note:**

> For kyolove writing contest prompt: Dozing Green, prompt 01: Dissection for RuThLeSs KiLlErS, and diexkyo_love theme 15. Revenge.  
> I feel like I have to say this. This is NOT how I feel Kyo is. This is a work of fiction and nothing more than that. If you can't handle the fact that I'm writing what I am, then just don't read it. Simple as that.  
> Song: "Dozing Green" by Dir en grey

_Mesmerized by those eyes with bugs crawling on them, my breathing stops_

I stare down at the work, the work of a man such as myself. A body dead and decaying, rotting in a forgotten alleyway, far away from prying eyes. Only my eyes can see the truth - the truth of a crime long since abandoned. The scene replays itself in my mind: a woman slashed to death by a glittering blade, dissected in the midst of the night. The glint of pleasure in the killer's eyes, his breath coming quick with anticipation in the cool night air. Her scream cut short as her throat is torn in two. Ecstatic cries of the killer as he works, satisfaction boiling in his veins.

The memory skitters away, leaving my heart racing and a delicious feeling deep in my gut. My hands itch to touch the remains, to trace the path of someone born after my own heart. I've longed for so many years to feel someone's flesh besides my own give way beneath my hands, to cradle their life in the palm of my hand and extinguish it within the blink of an eye. Watching used to be enough, trailing after a few select people in the dark, hiding away in the corner to watch their handiwork. Kneeling beside the victims as they die, showing them that I won't help, that their death is nothing but a simple fascination to me.

_My heart calms itself_

A smile curves my lips as I leave the scene, tossing my cigarette heedlessly down beside the corpse. Flames begin as I turn away. I laugh, joy filling my entire being at the knowledge of another crime concealed. Another cover-up done for the only man I hold dear to my heart.

_The refreshing sun mixes in with sound of the rain_

Pausing at the end of the alleyway, I turn to look back over my shoulder. The bright orange glow looks so much like the rising sun. If only the sun were close enough to feel in such a way, I'd take it and hold it, only to use it to take someone's life away at the very last moment.

Above me, the skies open up and rain begins to pour down. I stand, watching the fire grow stronger, as though it's only feeding off of the water. Deserved punishment won't be so easily dismissed. I scream for the hell of it, letting out the most horrible of sounds.

Someone passing by joins me in my screaming and rushes off yelling about the police. My scream turns to laughter and I walk away, leaving behind that bitch's burning corpse.

~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+

Months pass and the deaths come and go. Still I have not gotten my own hands dirty. I long for it. I need it. I want so badly to partake of such a delicious sin.

Tonight... this is the night for truth. I follow him, his flaming red hair guiding me, even in the darkness. I feel fresh, I feel alive. Tonight is a good night for killing.

He slips into a bar through the front door, his head low and his shoulders hunched. I make my way around back. Such a familiar routine. A cool breeze lifts my blonde hair and I laugh lightly at nothing in particular. I twirl around, my trench coat floating out around me, dancing with me. I fade back into the shadows and stand there, a smile directly from my soul meeting my lips.

It's almost an hour before the back door opens and a man in a business suit is shoved out, my red-headed light following closely behind, a ruthless grin on his face.

My breath hitches in my throat and I can feel that wonderful feeling settling in the pit of my stomach again. Another asshole on his way to meet his end. I can barely contain myself, my laughter wanting to bubble over and spill out into the night.

I watch as the two figures become entwined, fighting over who will die here tonight. I love it when it comes down to this. A fight for survival on both parts, but for completely different reasons. Several minutes pass by and then something skids across the pavement and hits the front of my shoe. I kneel down and take it into my hand. It's my baby's gun, the thing he's been contracted to use tonight.

As my fingers close around the cool metal, a thrill runs through my body. Tonight is _my_ night to kill. So it has been chosen.

A sickening scream pierces the night, quickly followed by gurgling. My eyes flick back to the scene, disappointment bubbling me that I couldn't use what I was given.

He's lying there, clutching his throat, blood the color of his hair, spilling from a wound far too big to close.

My eyes flash and I am quick to act, quick to seek revenge upon the man who would dare rob me of the only life besides my own that matters. I steady the gun and cock it, the click giving me away a mere second before I pull back the trigger.

The man's skull shatters as the bullet pierces it, a wide spray of blood and brains hitting the far wall of the alleyway as he pitches forward and collapses beside of my lover. I move from the shadows, my hands shaking and my heart breaking.

_My slashed heart dances, and I question in vain_

Why did _my_ night, my first kill have to be like this? Why do I have to lose what I care about most to get the job I so desired? I fall to my knees, reaching out and covering my red-headed beauty's hands with my own, tears streaking down my face as my fingers slip in his life-blood.

_The white voice, the leaking of the breath in the sun_

A light flicks on over us, exposing the scene in stark contrast. A fake sun to light up the night.

I grasp at him, desperation moving me closer. My lips close over his for just an instant and then I rest my head on his shoulder, my entire body shaking. His breath slips out, beautiful as always, despite being tainted by impending death.

"Goodbye, my love."

I pull away, my body arching as I fling my arms wide and scream for all I'm worth. The entire world must know of this atrocity. No one shall be left untouched for the wound that has been dug so deeply within me.

_The obscene exposure of the wound_

His hands slide away, his dying breath exiting from his body. I can see what killed him, exposed so obscenely to my view: a deep bloody canyon where one should not be. It kills me inside.

Tears blur my vision and I climb to my feet, stepping on the other man as I do. A sickening crunch doesn't even stop me as I pick up the gun and place it in my pocket.

I return to my corner and gather what we'd left there days ago, a can of gasoline and my gloves. I'm quick to cover both corpses, ensuring mutual destruction of the crimes committed here tonight.

I want to feel what I usually feel, but I can't bring myself to feel anything but the pain so deep inside my heart, a loss deeper than I could ever imagine.

I take the time to smoke one last cigarette... for him... for us. The last tears I'll ever shed fall from my eyes as I leave it all behind, flicking the remains over my shoulder.

The night ignites and I feel empty. I scream over the sound of the flames. I scream for him. I scream for my loss. And more than all of that, I scream for all that I cannot have.

_Disappears into nothing, the wind of dogma_

My screams fade away, lost in the dozens of others that fill the night. I can only assume this is the truth, this is what will carry me away. Acceptance without belief and then proof that there is God.

_Your melting heart_

I can only think of his body, melting away into this terrible night.

I wander the streets, aimless and lacking. The proof of existence should fill one, not empty their soul as it has mine. I cannot believe in that which takes away.

My steps pause as the reality of who I've been, of who _we've_ been, all these years sinks in. We were that which takes away. We were playing God. That cannot be without consequence.

The darkness begins to fade away, the sky lightening into a deep blue. I lift my face as a gentle rain begins to pour down over me.

_The dark morning, echoing goodbye_

The sky is crying for me, for the fact that I cannot cry any longer. I open my arms to it, my reply to his final words echoing as I scream it at the top of my lungs.

"Goodbye!"

_My slashed heart dances, and I question in vain_

Why is my heart beating so fast? I feel a soft breeze lift my hair and then all is still again. He's left me for good this time.

_I just want to be alone right now_

A thought touches the edges of my consciousness as I move away from my spot. People begin to flood by, not even stopping to notice that I'm covered in his blood. Such is what life has come to on this Earth.

_A single season of spring, even the tearful neck and you crawling the earth_

I stand beneath the trees, my hand caressing the weeping bark of each until I find the one I'm looking for. My eyes slide shut and I can see you, stalking me, crawling on your hands and knees toward me, that silly smile on your face.

_Love Me_

You asked me to love you that day. I had no choice but to do as you asked of me, my heart dictating the decision made in a split second. That day was the first day of the rest of my life... of our life.

Without you, I am nothing.

_Abandon Hope_

My hand slides into my pocket and I pull the gun from it. The rain falls from the leaves above me, pelting the smooth black surface. For a while, I just watch the water bead up and slide away.

The water abandons me, just as you have.

Today cannot be the first day of the rest of my life... without you.

Slowly I lift the gun to my head and close my eyes in a silent prayer - the last I'll ever say. I only wish to be taken with you. Not the hardest prayer to answer.

I pull the hammer back and it clicks into place, the sound of it resonating in the still morning. I can hear footsteps stop a few feet from me and when I open my eyes a small child is watching me. I laugh and cry at the same time. This is how I am to be stopped? Not a chance in hell.

I stare into the child's eyes and whisper the truth to him. "This is reality. This is the truth. A sinner's sins washed away by the morning rain." I close my eyes and pull the trigger.

**The End**  



End file.
